TEST PAGE OF AWESOMENESS

What kind of a father would I be if I said no?

OK, this has gotta stop. I’m going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can. I usually try to keep my sadness pent up inside where it can fester quietly as a mental illness. It’s toe-tappingly tragic!

I’ll get my kit! Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. THE BIG BRAIN AM WINNING AGAIN! I AM THE GREETEST! NOW I AM LEAVING EARTH, FOR NO RAISEN! Eeeee! Now say “nuclear wessels”! Ven ve voke up, ve had zese wodies.

I usually try to keep my sadness pent up inside where it can fester quietly as a mental illness.

We’ll go deliver this crate like professionals, and then we’ll go home. Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.” I suppose I could part with ‘one’ and still be feared…

  1. Interesting. No, wait, the other thing: tedious.
  2. You’re going back for the Countess, aren’t you?
  3. I saw you with those two “ladies of the evening” at Elzars. Explain that.

You know, I was God once.

Anyone who laughs is a communist! I love you, buddy! Noooooo! Check it out, y’all. Everyone who was invited is here. Now that the, uh, garbage ball is in space, Doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions?

  • Or a guy who burns down a bar for the insurance money!
  • Why not indeed!
  • I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want!

Yeah, lots of people did. Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.” Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun! What are you hacking off? Is it my torso?! ‘It is!’ My precious torso!

Or a guy who burns down a bar for the insurance money! Michelle, I don’t regret this, but I both rue and lament it. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school!

You, a bobsleder!? That I’d like to see! And I’m his friend Jesus. Oh, but you can. But you may have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil. And by “devil”, I mean Robot Devil. And by “metaphorically”, I mean get your coat.

Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way? And then the battle’s not so bad? All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school! With a warning label this big, you know they gotta be fun!

That’s not soon enough! But I’ve never been to the moon! But, like most politicians, he promised more than he could deliver. Actually, that’s still true. We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.

Yes. You gave me a dollar and some candy. Bender, you risked your life to save me! It’s just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. Also he got a race car. Is any of this getting through to you?

Kif might! Good news, everyone! There’s a report on TV with some very bad news! Switzerland is small and neutral! We are more like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood! Yes! In your face, Gandhi! Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.

It’s toe-tappingly tragic! I videotape every customer that comes in here, so that I may blackmail them later. Soothe us with sweet lies. Morbo can’t understand his teleprompter because he forgot how you say that letter that’s shaped like a man wearing a hat.

I’ll tell them you went down prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger. I just told you! You’ve killed me! Negative, bossy meat creature! Switzerland is small and neutral! We are more like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood!

Well, then good news! It’s a suppository. Tell them I hate them. I’m sure those windmills will keep them cool. You don’t know how to do any of those.

This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! OK, if everyone’s finished being stupid. Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you! I feel like I was mauled by Jesus.


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